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News and commentary on the life of the person behind this blog and on events in Sweden and around the world. Personal anecdotes, OP-Eds, reading suggestions, etc. Enjoy, and comment!
"Female hysteria was a once-common medical diagnosis, made exclusively in women, which is today no longer recognised by modern medical authorities as a medical disorder. Its diagnosis and treatment were routine for many hundreds of years in Western Europe. Hysteria was widely discussed in the medical literature of the Victorian era. Women considered to be suffering from it exhibited a wide array of symptoms including faintness, nervousness, insomnia, fluid retention, heaviness in abdomen, muscle spasm, shortness of breath, irritability, loss of appetite for food or sex, and "a tendency to cause trouble".*

I have a fear that this is what I will encounter should I visit one of the many wedding sites on the Internet, like Bröllopstorget or Brud & bröllop. I really don't like the wedding hysteria and with "wedding hysteria" I mean the fact that you need to buy the wedding dress and book the venue such a long time in advance. We're considering getting married already in October - if we book the venue within the next couple of weeks, it will give us five months for planning which should be sufficient in my view. However, people tell us that you need 8-12 months to plan. But do people who set the date a year in advance really spend a year actively planning and preparing their wedding? I don't think so.
That said, the more I start looking at this - I've been to two wedding dress shops and sent off requests to around 30 venues (luckily we neither have one preferred venue nor church so we're pretty flexible) - the more I feel the hysteria creeping up on me. Not necessarily that we wouldn't be able to plan for and throw a great party, but for all the choices! Most of the venues I have contacted have free Saturdays in October (and November-February, which we are also considering) so it's a matter of trying to compare their "offer" in terms of cost (and whether it includes drinks or not, and whether it is including or excluding VAT), location, finish time (some you need to vacate already at 1 am = not for us), etc. I have created an excel document with all this information but now when I look at it I just feel "I don't want to do this!". But I'm sure things will feel better once we have sat down and had a proper look, narrowed down the options, clarified the costs, visited a couple of places, etc. But I wish I was at that stage now! With a venue and a church (church is slightly easier as we don't have a connection to a particular one; that said, I have a few preferred ones) booked, I could concentrate on invitations and just planning to fun things.
I'm not as stressed about the wedding dress luckily. I went to a bridal shop last Saturday which sell ready-made dresses (but have a good in-house seamstress for alterations). Before my visit there I thought all that existed were at-least-five-months-waiting-time-and-if-you-don't-come-in-at-least-half-a-year-before-the-wedding-they-look-at-you-weirdly places, so I was relieved that these shops actually exist. I found a really pretty and a bit unusual dress there that they are holding for me. However, last Monday I visited another shop which do custom-order only and I think I will get one from them in the end, I just need to choose one among the four or five or so that I liked! Delivery is around three months, slightly longer due to summer holidays, but it should be ready in time for an October wedding.
If October is what we'll go for, that is. I'm keen on October, early October, because autumn is still in full colour then. If that does't work I'm inclined to wait until January or February when the chance of snow is greater. November is just such a dark, boring month (though in need of a party one could argue) and December is Christmas really (though I could imagine a Lucia wedding too).
Decision, decisions, decisions. Will keep you posted!
*It continues... "Since ancient times women considered to be suffering from hysteria would sometimes undergo "pelvic massage" — manual stimulation of the genitals by the doctor until the patient experienced "hysterical paroxysm" (orgasm)." Ehum...
Images from Wikipedia and boskraddare.com





Image from rosenskarasdiversehandel.blogspot.com
I was ten years old and it was the last few weeks of third grade (and also the end of the first three years of school, before it was time to move up a level; it was June). We had a sports day of sorts and were spending the day in a field flying kites and doing other activities. At some point we were playing at the top of the hill near an old abandoned house, or cottage really. That's when it happened. I had just jumped off the roof - our play was mostly climbing up and jumping off - when I took one step and...
I remember that it hurt more to pull back than when the nail went in... But first I actually ran all the way down the hill to my teachers and it wasn't until I sat down that I felt, or allowed myself to feel, the pain and the pounding. Luckily the nail hadn't gone all the way through but it was bleeding pretty bad and my pink trainers that I liked so much were staining quickly.
The immediate bleeding was stopped and the wound dressed but I was still in excruciating pain (as far as excruciating goes for a ten-year old). But did I say anything? No. Because later that evening my class had a party to celebrate "graduating" from third grade and also to say goodbye to each other after three years as many of us were not going to the same school or same class anymore. Did I want to miss that? No, of course not.
So I pretended. And this is where the white lies come in, Taina's third theme for April.
According to Wikipedia, a white lie "would cause only relatively minor discord if it were uncovered, and typically offers some benefit to the hearer. White lies are often used to avoid offense, such as complimenting something one finds unattractive. In this case, the lie is told to avoid the harmful realistic implications of the truth."
I guess my lying doesn't really qualify as a white lie as I didn't really lie for the benefit of the hearer but for myself. The lie was "told to avoid harmful realistic implications of the truth", but for me, not for someone else. My lie was more about being "economical with the truth", telling an "emergency lie" or "lying by omission", or essentially trying to get away with something, but it will have to do for the sake of the story :)
Image from imperfectation.comSo I told my teachers I was fine, "it didn't hurt that much", and also said the same to my dad when he picked me up. It wasn't until my mum got home a bit later that "the sh*t hit the fan". She yelled at my dad for not seeing that I was pale and just pretending to be fine and for not having taken me to the hospital (she wasn't too happy with my teachers either) while I tried to plead with her "no, mum, I'm fine, I want to go to the party, we can go to the hospital tomorrow!".
How the story ends? Well, we ended up going to the hospital where the wound was properly cleaned and dressed and I was given a tetanus shot. I was pretty upset about missing the party but secretely happy of not having to pretend anymore and being taken care of. And now, years later, who cares about that party anyway! And besides, my classmates thought a nail in the foot as pretty cool :)

